There was a time when I couldn’t *not* react.
One sideways look, one offhand comment, and I’d spiral—into defensiveness, silence, rage, or shame.
I didn’t understand why things affected me so deeply. I just knew I felt out of control, ashamed, and exhausted.

But what I didn’t know then is that those moments… those *triggers*… weren’t signs I was broken.
They were *invitations*—whispers from my shadow saying, “It’s time.”

Everything changed the day I stopped reacting long enough to pause.

Before I got sober, I lived in a constant state of emotional reactivity.
I didn’t know what regulation felt like. I only knew the storm—the sudden heat of shame, the collapse into silence, the need to defend, escape, or disappear.

When I finally admitted I was being triggered—that something old was rising up in me—I began to heal.

Here’s the truth I had to learn the hard way:
💡 You can’t heal what you can’t name.

Most people don’t realize when they’re triggered.
They think the problem is the person in front of them.
But healing starts when you shift your attention inward and ask:

• What am I feeling right now?

• Where have I felt this before?

• What part of me is being activated?

This is how we name it.
This is how we reclaim it.

Let me tell you what happens when you pause instead of reacting:
You interrupt the cycle.
You give yourself a moment of grace.

Even if it’s just one deep breath—just five seconds of noticing what’s happening—you’ve stepped off the hamster wheel of unconscious survival patterns and stepped into conscious choice.

You don’t have to suppress the feeling.
You don’t have to fix it.
You just have to feel it… and let it pass through.

And that pause?
That’s where the sacred lives.

Pausing isn’t about pretending you’re not upset.
It’s about reconnecting to yourself before you abandon her.

When I was deep in my addict archetype, I thought the only way to feel better was to escape the feeling altogether. But now I know my emotions weren’t trying to destroy me—they were trying to lead me home.

When we pause, we make space for the invisible child inside us to whisper what she needs.
And we can finally listen.

So the next time something lights a fire in you, try saying:

“I’m noticing that I’m triggered. And that’s okay. I choose to pause. I choose to be here with myself.”

That’s the work.
That’s the healing.

In the next few weeks, I’ll be sharing something special—a calming tool you can use in just 15 minutes to shift from reactivity to clarity. It’s helped me and my clients soften some of life’s most overwhelming moments.

But you don’t need that tool to begin.

All you need right now is this:
Notice. Pause. Name it.

Because that one simple step?
It changes everything.

Want more tools like this? Stay tuned or book a complimentary Discovery Call to explore your healing path.