by | Aug 30, 2020


Let’s face it; times are dark. You can sense the weight of the shadow hovering over you, doing its best to seduce you. The shadow has a power you can feel; it’s mysterious and alluring, and it reins you in as it softly calls you by name. It has millions of answers from which to choose.

And the light, well, you don’t feel the power of it as much. But light has only one answer, and that is the TRUTH.

As a seeker of truth, I know how challenging it can be to stand in the light when all you want to do is run and hide underneath that cloak of darkness. It is so much easier to say, “I’ve had it. I can’t do this anymore.” I know. I’ve done it. I’ve said those very words.

But I keep returning to my inner GPS, my soul, that tells me I cannot give in or give up and that I’ve worked too hard to get where I am to throw it all away. The world needs lightkeepers to lead the way out of this dark abyss into which we’ve fallen. And to be a lightkeeper, I need to embrace and love my shadow, expressly, my anger before it turns to rage.

As a Caroline Myss’s Sacred Contracts Online Course student, where you determine your archetypes and their light and shadow aspects, I have a foothold on what work is necessary. As I revisited the Wounded Child, I was asked to list three ways I expressed anger.

They were:

  1. I stuffed it, pushing it down and internalizing it. My first memory of doing this was when my younger brother died. I was six years old, and not only did I experience a great deal of grief, but I was also angry. My parents never showed this emotion, and I didn’t know what to do with it, thinking I’d be punished if I said something. Loud voices scared me.
  2. I would start to cry because I didn’t know what to do with the feeling. I didn’t grow up in an environment where there was arguing or anger, so I believed it would be wrong. My parents never yelled or argued; I was never privy to it if they did. I saw my mother cry – a lot. I was able to copy this behavior.
  3. From young adulthood on, I would explode like a ticking time bomb. I never knew where this came from because my parents never modeled the behavior. It was when I heard Caroline at a seminar say, “The shadow of the Wounded Child comes out when they don’t get their way. They have temper tantrums. It’s not personal, but outbursts will always occur until they realize and accept this. Embracing this part of the archetype allows you to make the shadow your ally.”

I am identifying the areas where my anger arises. It is not hard to do considering the environment we live in today. Once I’ve finished with that, I will allow the areas to be just as they are and hold space to be experienced safely – no road rage here! And finally, I will take that fire and use it to fuel my coaching business so I can be a conduit for healing.

In what ways do you express anger? Have you identified triggers that set your anger off in an unhealthy way? If you are a woman, do you want to embrace that society says we shouldn’t show that part of you?

My new Online Course, Say Hello to your Shadow Fears, is out now.

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Debbie Gill - author and coach

Debbie gill

The heart and soul behind Go Within Spiritual Coaching.