Step Three: Search and Find the Underlying Pattern (Part 1 of 2)
Now that you’ve identified a problem and set a clear transformational goal for your life, it’s time to explore the underlying patterns of your paradigm, which may be locked in place and invisible. Most paradigms are formed in early childhood, so you may find yourself revisiting this time of life.
“All life is a pattern …but we cannot always see the pattern when we are a part of it.” ~ Belva Plain
As your partner in the exploration, I will ask probing questions such as:
- What assumptions have you made that helped create the current paradigm?
- What does the paradigm look like?
- What beliefs do you have that created your behavior patterns?
- When did these behavior patterns first appear?
- What has prevented you from confronting this pattern?
Many other insightful questions can be posed, but these are a solid start. We are not looking for the cause or solution here, just exploring the aspects of your paradigm. You’ll be given the paradigm map to begin filling out.
The Current Paradigm Map here is a sample of a partial paradigm map for you to understand how it works.
The Space of Exploration
Think of exploring your paradigm as a glorious event, not something you dread. Since this is your journey, you’ll be given and held space to question and examine areas of your life. The space will be safe, so beliefs that no longer serve you can be eliminated, allowing you to look at others and see if they are more appropriate for you.
Out beyond the ideas of wrongdoing and right doing, there lies a field. I’ll meet you there.” ~ Rumi
When you are ready for a paradigm shift, knowing you are held in a safe space or container is highly critical, one you can trust. When things get emotional, and they will, knowing you have a non-judgmental and compassionate ear that understands what you’re going through is essential. There’s no path forward for your journey of exploration if you don’t have trust.
When you are in a safe environment with a trusted listener, you’ll have the freedom to probe and explore uncomfortable feelings and emotions essential to any healing. You may be nudged but never pushed.
The approach to discovering your underlying paradigm is tailored for you. You will be met right where you are and not where you have never been before, which will come later.
Slowing It Down to Find the Pattern
You will be listened to and heard if you get activated or triggered. The process will be slowed but not stopped. Something profound needs to be addressed, and you must explore it. You may want to answer my probing questions quickly, but know they are surface deflections.
To get to the root cause determining your paradigm is similar to peeling the layers of skin of an onion; you deal with them one at a time and then move on to the next. It also depends on how ingrained and locked in place the paradigm is. There is no one-size-fits-all way to find it. Some may be discovered quickly, some slowly, but they will always be found if you work for it.
Also, slowing down the process allows the space for you to answer intuitive questions and not be controlled by your unconscious or automatic responses. Making wise decisions leads to desirable consequences and results.
In Part 2, The Process of Finding the Underlying Pattern, How the Paradigm Formed, and more, will be laid out for you in a simple and easy-to-understand manner. I look forward to sharing it with you. Please reach out and connect with me if you have any questions—or schedule a complimentary 15-minute discovery call for more information.
Blessings, and until then, Be Conscious!
Debbie
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